Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
