Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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