My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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