Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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