So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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