We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize