If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Farmville is her only friend.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
