Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
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Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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