i don't like sucking hair
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I'm always down for nudity.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
