First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
