Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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