those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
foreskin is a definite game changer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
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