in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
