No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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