Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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