Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
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