I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
