How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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