Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
