Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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