I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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