My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
