They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
your like the ambassador to my penis.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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