She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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