K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
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