Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world