He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
the raccoons are back...
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