Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
