at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
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Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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