Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
