I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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