I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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