i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
These 27 Hilarious People Wrote Their Own Obituaries
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick