I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
the evidence from last night is not good...
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts