as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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