Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize