It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
