Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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