I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
i've created a new STD.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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