3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
