I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
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woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
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I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
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