Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
