Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize
