i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize
