So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Randomize
