ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
