Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Panties = found
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