If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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