He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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