he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
