Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
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