i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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